The other day, a bright, cheerful girl in one of my classes was not concentrating. She was talking to the person next to her, and I when told her to stop, she did - but resumed 5 minutes later. I was pissed off, and told her to move seats. When she'd moved (after a 'no, I'm serious' comment from me), she stopped doing any work, and just sat there. I told her to stop being so mardy, and gave her a minimum amount of work to do, which she did.
At the end of the lesson, I asked her to stay, but before I spoke to her I turned to put some papers on a shelf. As I let my breath out with the lesson over, I realised: this is not how I do this. This is not the right way to do this. My frustration with a normally delightful student was stopping me doing what I know is right. I took a deep breath and turned around to her grumpy face. 'Hey, looks like you're having a bad day. What's up? Are you ok?'
It all came out - a worrying friendship issue and an argument with mum this morning. No big issues, but big enough when you're 12 to distract from long division. She talked for a few minutes, then apologised for her behaviour. I told her that I hoped she felt happier soon, and the next lesson she grinned at me and worked away cheerfully.
Every time. You have to do it every time. When you're tired, when you're frustrated, when you have a headache, when you've got a thousand things to do. I have to listen every time
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